Goodnight

I always knew that it was possible for kids to be very similar to one or both of their parents. In my mind though, that growth happened through time and years of living with the  other person. Crazy to see how different it is now after having a little girl, and seeing the similarities. She hasn't grown enough to "copy" certain things about me, they're just already there in her precious 1.5 year old personality.

This is on my mind because i am noticing how stubborn Riah is. I'm noticing how much of a pain in the butt she can be when shes about to get in trouble. She knows the difference between right and wrong. When she is in the wrong she knows it but freezes and just stares me down. She is such a good listener, except in these moments. In these moments she hears my firm "no!" but stands still as a statue and looks at me. Mostly its the issue at bedime. I tell her to get to bed and she turns into the mini statue that stared down Medusa.

When I was little, maybe 7 or 8, I would have these thoughts at bedtime that scarred me. "What if i was the only one left on earth?" I thought because of the extreme quiet. So I would always want to sleep in the living room on the couch. Even if It was time to fall asleep I wanted to be near everyone and have noise to comfort me. And when Andrew and I were being sneaky we would go out and sit behind the couch and watch TV while mom was sitting a foot away. I can't believe we actually thought she didnt see us! So sly...  

So this issue at bedtime I had, is now and issue I am dealing with at home with my toddler. But she never saw me do this so how funny it seems that shes just like me and doesnt even know it. I find her in the hallway, living room, my room, sleeping away with her blanky. When I check on her during nap, and in the middle of the night, or in the morning I find her sprawled out comfortably on the rug. Does she not like her bed? Is she afraid of the dark? No.. I think she just wants to be near me. 

Yesterday for her nap I found her in the hall fast asleep. When it was bedtime and she refused over and over and over to stay in bed, she had to hear from Dada, but even then she just got even more sneaky about it. Instead of crying and fussin she just found her way back into the light, the noise, the company of Patience and I and I had no clue. I went into my room and then proceeded to check on her. Not in her bed. Not on her floor...  Back to my room, not there. Walking back into the living room I see her by the couch fast asleep with her butt in the air and knees tucked. She looked so cute. I walked passed her how many times and didnt even know she came out and fell asleep there! So sneaky and not even 2 yet. 

Silly Riah. . . 

I hope I have more moments holding her rather than laying her down. More "yes" rather than always telling her "no." I hope one day she will be content when I leave the house and happy to spend time with Dada without missing me so much. I hope I make the right decisions in her life. I love my sneaky girl. 

I used to know this song. I didnt know it that well so its funny to me that looking at this photo made me think of it. By Phillips Craig and Dean. Here's the chorus:

Lord, I want to be just like You
'Cause he wants to be just like me
I want to be a holy example
For his innocent eyes to see
Help me be a living Bible, Lord
That my little boy can read
I want to be just like You 'Cause he wants to be like me



Lord I pray my life can be a good example for my kids. Give me wisdom and joy so that I always treat them well, teach them all that I possibly can and create a happy joyful life for them to grow in.